4 Reasons You Aren’t Ready For A Relationship

4 Reasons You Aren’t Ready For A Relationship

4 Reasons You Aren’t Ready For A Relationship

1. You think a relationship will make you feel better.

Whatever problems you have going on in life, I guarantee that getting yourself into a relationship won’t fix all of them. Sure, you might find some short-term peace, but a relationship alone isn’t going to make you feel any better. Respect someone enough to not use them as a solution for your hardships. (Matthew 11:28)

2. You think a relationship will bring you a sense of worth and identity.

Your worth is not found within a relationship, but instead God. Don’t date hoping someone will bring you a sense of worth that was intended to be fulfilled by your faith. When you place your worth upon the shoulders of someone else, you will inevitably be let down and disappointed. God won’t let you down. (Galatians 2:20)

3. You think a relationship will make you feel less lonely.

Short-term relationships will never fulfill long-term loneliness. Before you get yourself into a relationship with someone, you first need to find out where your internal loneliness is coming from. A relationship will only fulfill you for so long, until you then try to fill the void with someone new. Seek fulfillment in God alone before trying to seek the heart of someone else.  (Hebrews 12:2)

4. You date recreationally, and not intentionally.

If you’re dating for the sake of dating, you’re not ready for a real relationship. When it comes to dating, one must be mature enough to understand the harm recreational dating can have on someone’s heart and soul. If you’re looking to date, make sure your intentions are pure and focused. Don’t waste someone’s time so that you can have some fun. (Proverbs 21:8)

-Jarrid Wilson


What are your thoughts? Leave a comment below.

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  • moo April 9, 2015 at 10:01 AM

    Same scenario. One of the hardest. Your mind say’s: move on. But your heart say’s : hold on.
    Just keep praying.

  • Anon April 6, 2015 at 11:55 PM

    I am completely understand this and know I am not ready, but could you please help me with a questions I have been struggling with? Is it wrong to want to hold on to the hope of being with someone? I mean we didn’t work because I wasn’t ready but still had mutual feeling for each other. But what about when I am ready? I mean God has been working greatly in my life these days. But she truly make me feel great. And being without her feels like I am almost missing a part of myself all of a sudden. Don’t get me My life is full and God makes me happy everyday. I just need advice or maybe you could turn this into a blog piece. But I am really struggling on trying to understand what God wants me to do or learn from our relationship between her and I.

  • lei g h nettles December 17, 2014 at 7:37 PM

    Will Love to Share with Youth Group!!!! So very true and encouraging for Young America.

  • Sophia October 29, 2014 at 9:49 PM

    I love this! I took a class with a husband and wife as a professor who also wrote a few books together. One of my favorite lines that they mention is “If you try to find intimacy with another person before achieving a sense of wholeness on your own, all your relationships become an attempt to complete yourself.”

    Relationships can only be as healthy as you are. Therefore one of the most important things you’ll ever do to build healthy relationships is work on your own personal wellbeing – emotionally, spiritually, and relationally. Truth be told, we can’t rely on someone else to complete us.

    This article just helped me remember that class and that line really well. Great article! Thank you for this!

  • Anna Young September 24, 2014 at 11:06 PM

    Non of those reasons apply to me, been single for 5 years & one date- Our Lord is no1 & unless He is in a relationship I’m staying single :-)

  • ultimategiby September 24, 2014 at 5:21 PM

    I’m sure a long term relationship would make me feel better … not a relation with anyone… a relation with the one the Lord has chosen for me

  • Aries August 18, 2014 at 5:52 AM

    Funny that the first descriptor in his micro bio is “Husband”. Yeah, right.

  • jannet July 11, 2014 at 2:38 AM

    I used to believe in god when i was younger but then I guess I had little to no religious influence around me so I kind of just put it to the back of my mind. Until my mid-late teens when I started becoming interested in the world around us and the universe.
    I learned how incredibly tiny our world here on earth is compared to the whole universe. our big earth is in our big solar system which is in the milky way galaxy (group of approx.10 BILLION solar systems). we are a part of the milky way and it is INCREDIBLY HUGE! almost impossible to comprehend. there are estimated to be up to 200 BILLION galaxies ranging from smaller to way bigger than the milky way.

    I just find it hard to believe that some entity created everything, only put life on one planet and the only thing he left for us was a book that doesn’t really tell us much except for some morals

    • thewordsthewriterwrote July 17, 2014 at 6:31 AM

      Guess it comes down from perspective. Imagine the universe is like massive valley surrounded by epic mountains. You live in the valley in a place were a loving, caring father has provide everything you need to survive, more than that to prosper and grow. He placed you in something beautiful so you can admire it and have grasp of how great and limitless he is. He gave you the mountains to admire their majesty and to be something of awe. You might not be able to climb its peeks but you can definitely admire them like beautiful works of art. God has not left though, thats the perception of clockwork universe. He is to be discovered, seen not just in the bible and its words, rather in all creation just like you can get to understand a painter from his paintings you get to understand God from his creation.

    • Carlo September 13, 2014 at 7:32 PM

      The book is a GUIDE not just MORALS. Try reading it.

    • kim October 9, 2014 at 4:15 PM

      Ask the Lord to show Himself to you. JESUS IS REAL!!!! praying for you. :-)

    • courtney October 28, 2014 at 1:03 AM

      The Bible has a lot more than just morals. And God allowed us to discover how big the universe is so we could see just how much bigger HE is to have created it. Don’t give up on him, he hasn’t given up on you :)

    • Meg P November 28, 2014 at 7:43 PM

      Have you seen ANY evidence that disproves God?

    • Florence Ouimet-Fontaine December 2, 2014 at 4:19 PM

      Do you have evidence that disproves Zeus?

    • Ditza December 2, 2014 at 4:42 PM

      As a college student aiming for a PhD in theoretical physics, I agree that is almost impossible that an entity put life just on earth. I do however believe on a higher entity, one creative enough for all the universe to exist and even multiverse that hold life other than just us. And about the book, it actually says more than just morals.

  • Josephine Nthuli July 7, 2014 at 3:54 AM

    A friend sent me this link because he knew what i had been going through. having read this, i am not so sure anymore about dating because i am in conflict with myself. i think i have forgiven myself for that sad past but it keeps coming back i broke up with my boyfriend but trust me, i am not getting over him. he actually sent me this link. i guess love is one long journey yet to be understood by many

  • Diamondjoan July 3, 2014 at 12:44 AM

    God help us, its so easy for some and so so complicated for the rest of us.

  • hannah jeffers June 27, 2014 at 10:36 AM

    I do not disagree >>> but i will share a testimony with you :) before i got married i was in an ABUSIVE relationship and also partied a lot, i had walked away from God in my teenage years and went through a lot of hardships and heart aches , friends boyfriends family everything was a mess…. Than i lost my job as a waitress , well i went to the restaurant where i just got fired from to have a few drinks with some friends …. little did i know i caught someones eye. the next day i received a facebook message from a guy i went to high school with who wanted to spend time with me an get to know me better . little did he know my life was a wreck . we hung out a few times and got along but he knew some of the things i was going through and that i didnt want to date and i also had serious trust issues . well to sum it up , he saw my light i had forgotten all about and he helped me get back to who i was when i had God . i went back to church , got a job as a nanny , and we were married after 2 years of dating , …. sometimes when we think we arent ready to date, than GOD gives us a gift and sends someone to help us . I call my husband my angel and i am his he hadnt gone to church for over 10 years and when he saw how i had changed he started ,to go to church with me , then we found our own church we both love and he started praying again and now we are a happy,, christian,, God lovin ,married couple . believe in mirales, believe in God .

    • maria goretti September 24, 2014 at 9:37 PM

      praise God!

    • neil November 30, 2014 at 6:22 AM

      Hannah, Thank God! as he chosen you & your husband to shared your wonderful testimony which helps others whom need the light of Lord Jesus! because worldly knowledge is different. Once we experienced the taste of God! only we realize the truth!May God Bless You!!

  • gwallaby02 June 27, 2014 at 6:22 AM

    I honestly don’t think I’ll ever be “ready” for a relationship, by these terms. I’m 30 and although I know Jesus, I still struggle with self-worth and loneliness, and I think I always will on this side of heaven. But I think God can still bless me with a relationship even if I’m trying to fulfill my needs with that relationship. God will show me through that relationship that He is the only one who can fulfill my needs.

  • Brittany June 24, 2014 at 10:04 PM

    Maria, you are right. Rest in The Lord and He will bring the person to you. I’m a living breathing example of it.

  • Mash June 24, 2014 at 4:57 PM

    I have dated and been hurt a few times and all the time I have been told I’m a great guy but things still haven’t worked out. I even got engaged and still ended up being left in the cold. I realized that in life people make their choices no matter how hard you try to please them. I realized that I was so into being with someone that even God had been put second in my life. The hurt has made me realise that I need to totally depend on God and pray for him to be I full control of all aspects of my life. I still believe that in his perfect timing the desires of my heart will be fulfilled and I will find that someone that he has for me and until then I will delight in him.

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